I don't want to leave Pakistan.

I am yearning to stay, to continue my experience by furthering my understanding.

However, I wonder if the novelty will wear off when I am not in the transition phase, in the position to depart.

As soon as I was aware that I had one week remaining, I lost all my inhibitions. I'm sorry to report that it was this approaching deadline of my absence that did it.

During this time, I have spoken to doctors, nurses, medical students, housewives, Muslim scholars, grandmothers, and children about this connection between the body and soul that I came here to explore. And I am finally aware of the infinite depth, the searchless wonder that comes with such an idea.

I think then, that the importance of such a journey, is marked by those people who are determined to understand how the body and soul works for themselves: in their own life, as a product of genetics, as a product of God, or both.

I attended a lecture today that spoke about the portrayal of violence in the media, especially perpetuated by Islamic countries. In the lecture, a scholar spoke about a particular book, called "In the Name of Honour" which is a narrative of a woman, Mukhtaran Mai. She was gang raped by her village, and then due to this, was expected to commit suicide.
However, in her narrative, the voice heard is not only the author's, but the voices of the publisher, translators, and editor. The lecture explored the accuracy that the portrayal of a story ultimately has after it has been polished and tuned by all the collaborators. Unfortunately, the book was not even translated into Urdu for the people of Mukhtaran's own country.

There are those novel books that speak about the horrors and the tragedies that occur in places that we have never dared to venture to. And for some reason, I never was interested in reading them, no matter how great the praise it received.

Sometimes, I want to do the sensing, to experience what I have heard about.

So this is what I am rambling on for.

After coming to Pakistan, I have come to understand this. Do not make your judgements based on the media, or the news, or the magazines, or those books. They are not entirely honest. Nothing really is.

The best you can do then, is decide NOT to decide. To choose NOT to make a conclusion. To be aware that even as I am here, in this country, I am still not even close to beginning to see what it is. And as much as I wanted one to clasp in my hands, there is no thesis, no final summary you can tuck between the pages of your mind and then, satisfied, close the the volume and place it back on the shelf to accumulate dust.

Diamonds have facets. Imagine the detriment to their beauty if you only looked at one.